- orangeuntold
- May 31
- 2 min read
When thought-terminating clichés are used by leaders or in groups, they can foster toxic cultures by discouraging questions, dissent, and accountability if not addressed and handled properly. Most of these phrases we heard often from leadership at Orange. The phrases listed here aren’t inherently toxic, but when used to shut down dialogue, avoid responsibility, or discourage truth-telling, they become tools of coercion and control.
Not every organization or leader who uses these clichés has bad intentions. However, a healthy organization and a healthy leader will welcome pushback when concerns are raised about their use.
“We are a family.”
This phrase demands and exploits loyalty, usually enacting backlash when that loyalty is broken (i.e. quitting your job). It creates a false unity that guilts people into silence and discourages conflict resolution.
The reality is, there’s a difference between being coworkers or employees, and family members. And blurring those lines can allow boundary-crossing and enmeshment.
“That’s just how they are.”
This statement absolves the person of accountability, and communicates they are unable, or shouldn’t have to, change.
Other than blantantly dismissing red flags or harmful behavior, this phrase blocks change and innovation—especially when used by someone in leadership.
"If you don’t agree, you can leave."
This silences dissenters, reinforces authoritarian control, abuses power, and punishes vulnerability or feedback.
"Let’s not dwell on the past." or “Let’s move forward.” or “Let’s focus on the future.”
These phrases dismiss harm and impedes healing, especially after misconduct or abuse. It essentially communicates “just stop thinking or talking about it.”
“Trust then verify.”
When used to defend someone in power, this phrase can be harmful. When used to believe someone with less power, this phrase is exactly the course of action.
“If even one person gets saved, it’s worth it.”
This can be used as an excuse for abusive leadership or toxic systems for the sake of spiritual reward. In other words, as long as there’s a perceived “good” result, the suffering of those involved is “worth” it.
No system whose goal is redemption requires abuse.
“The mission is too important.”
This prioritizes organizational goals over individual well-being, often silencing concerns about misconduct or burnout and justifying unethical behavior for the “greater good.”
"God will judge them."
This avoids accountability in faith-based settings, sidelining justice and victim advocacy. This can be used to allow an organization to do less when it comes to accountability for abusers.
“Everybody's business is everybody's business.”
At first glance, this may seem to foster transparency and unity, but when used by leadership to micromanage, it’s used to shut down boundaries, privacy, and dissent. It suppresses autonomy, enables gossip, and encourages an echo chamber.
“Greatness comes from character and character comes from pain and suffering.”
This phrase creates an environment where abuse can happen, under the guise of character-building. It’s dangerous, and misleading.